Here's another one for the kids and you!!
           If I had words...
                       to make a day for you....
                                                I would make a morning, golden and true.
           I would make this....
                        day last for all time....
                                                then give you a night filled with moonshine!

I love you!!

These Eyes

These eyes were introduced to your image before we ever met. In fact, I saw you first in a crowd at Sink to the Top camp adventure week picture book mark in March 2002. At that time you were just a face in a crowd of people I admired who were getting ready to embark on adventures around the globe and I dreamed of what my adventure would look like when I joined AIM that fall and would be selected to go, who knows where. I didn't actually meet you that week, which still surprises me since the first person I met was Brandon and he was your teammate. I mostly spent time with the Mexico team since I was sleeping in their apartment and I hung out with the New Zealand/Scotland team (aka Nate and Rachel) who was your best bud....but still we didn't meet. 

   But the next time these eyes began to notice your smile and pay attention to your striped shirts and black hair, was that fall as we stared at pictures hung telling us about the teams that were leading the way in other countries and who many of us would one day work side by side with. Honestly at that time, I really didn't want to end up in Ukraine, but I began to look up to Kris Smith and his advice and wisdom and he really liked your team. So, as I tried to like the other teams...and I certainly liked many of the other locations, I would find myself staring at your board. I knew I would like working with Brandon (or I thought I would since I talked to him at camp adventure) so Ukraine began to be on my mind. 

    But when I was chosen for Ukraine, I was pretty sad because of the team I was on. I felt like the scraps....like we were the..."don't know what to do with these guys" group. But I kept finding joy in knowing I was going to work with Kris' favorites. The day that sticks out as the day I will never forget though, was that moment. Tulsa, OK. AIMers gathered in a room to sing and hear a message. That's when these eyes knew....it was a moment I wasn't really expecting, but these eyes saw that smile in person and saw your eyes and the smile and warmth in your eyes....then these ears heard you lead us in worship...and these eyes saw how bold and charming and how everyone was drawn to you like I was. That was the day these eyes never forgot. Many things happened after that moment and I hold each moment...each image in my heart! These eyes have seen so much more over the years that I have been allowed to watch you grow. Watch you smile. Watch you cry. Watch you be silly and funny and smart and clever and onery and courageous and encouraging and adorable ....so many things these eyes have seen. I wish I could replay so many things these eyes have seen because every moment with you has been a treasure I wish I could hold. Instead I will keep my eyes open to the moments I still get to have with you. I will count my blessings each day I still have my sight so I can witness these treasures! My life is so wonderful and I love that these eyes get to see you times 4 in the children our love made! And their 8 eyes get to see the wonder that is you! They will never forget the moments they watch you. Just like me. You have captivated each of us and we long to have just one more moment to see you with these eyes! And never doubt that these eyes belong only to you my love...forever yours....from those early days on I have always hoped that I would catch your eye as well. I still cant believe it somedays....that you actually stopped and looked at me and wanted me like I wanted you. But I will forever cherish that moment in the snow when I saw something there that wasn't there before. And the moments in the van on the way to Donetsk with your cheesy hand holding through your coat....the look in your eyes said I don't want to leave YOU...I can't forget that. And today...I see that look so often and still feel so lucky that you still look at me like you choose me. Thank you for letting these eyes see that....and for all you are because these eyes can't get enough of you! I love you!!

Today I decided to try and record a couple of songs on video for the kids. I wanted to have it so that one day they will still be able to hear me sing to them even if I am gone. Yep, it's cheesy but you know I have always been this cheesy! LOL! Even though back in the day I just used cassette tapes to record messages for my kids, so at least this is an upgrade right?  Anyway, so...here is "Into the West" and if you are wondering...why did it just end...well, the computer battery died and I didn't want to do it again so I just went with it! :)
    Love you!

Here is my first attempt at uploading a video for you on our blog....it also took me forever to actually get on the blog because for the life of me I couldn't remember how to log on! Sometimes I just can't get with it! LOL! I love you!

Support and Motivation

You. Somehow you are always there in just the right way and right time. These past 2 weeks we started exercising, eat the same foods, and reading scripture together in the mornings. I must say, there is nothing like having your best friend come beside you and be exactly what you need! And you have been just that. I have never felt better. Yes, I have been eating this way for a long time now....and yes, I started exercising before you joined in. But those things done alone were so much harder than it has been these 2 weeks. I don't dread it. I look forward to accomplishing it! I can feel the muscles changing in my body and getting stronger and my heart is so much fuller after getting to read the Word every day for no other reason than to read it. So why doesn't it matter so much to me?? I have had these goals in my heart and thoughts for years now and always start the next year again thinking...."COME ON Melissa! Same goals, same intentions....you never follow through!" So for 2 weeks, we have been meeting some of my yearly goals that have longed plagued my heart with disappointment and frustration. I want to daily be in the Word. To eat healthy. To have consistent exercise. And to start my day with YOU. So BOOM! You are my support and helper in accomplishing a few of the HUGE burdens I have carried for so long! Thank you! If someone asks what a good marriage is to me, I would say this, to have someone that walks with you day after day and somehow manages to make you better even when you believe it will never happen! You have been beside me and support me and right now you are helping me have joy and peace in my life! There are always things that shake up our lives and bring us down, but I am the kind of person that finds the greatest joy in knowing I am doing all that I can to BE good and DO good. Today....and these 2 weeks have brought great joy!  I am healthy both in how I eat and keep making my body stronger,I am  seeking God,and  I am seeking to help others.
             I know I probably get on your nerves with all my ideas. But I do appreciate that you listen and care about what I have to say. I feel such a burden to use all that I can to serve others and to make a difference. I know that I will only have a few short years left in this world and the older I get the less I will be ABLE to do physically. I don't want to waste a moment! As bad as this year has felt with different issues with the church and elders and people....this has been the first year I really feel like we have direction to go....without waiting for someone's permission! We have taken steps by our faith and choosing. Even your schooling. No matter what is said....it was OUR choice and I am happy that we did it. You have learned so much and I believe you will use your talents and God will bless others through you. I am also happy we are foster parents. Although no child has entered our home yet, we are available!! I think that word is so good! I want us to be that....AVAILABLE- to God, to others, to make a difference, to our children, and to each other. How much good can we do because we choose to be available!? I believe tons! The fruit will multiply in how we show love and how others then choose to love as well. I believe our children see our hearts and actions and want to be like that too! They bring such joy and love to this world and I know God will take their kind and willing hearts and continue to work in them as He is in ours and in theirs even now. I am really excited about making a difference in Allendale too. We can shine Christ's love all over this community and become a beacon! No matter what the future brings...let's do that! You and me- together! Always!

I love you!

Hi You!

I don't have much time before the kids get home from school but I wanted to write you! It's been awhile since I have written to you from the blog. I hope you don't think I forgot! I haven't. Just keep being occupied with lots of other things and you know how I hardly ever get on the computer unless I  have something specific I need to get done. Sorry about that.
I do love you...tons. I mean, I know that this isn't the only way that I can say I love you, but it is one of the many ways! I never want you to forget! You mean so much to me that I really should take time to show you every day somehow just how much I love you! I know the pressures of life and all the things we have to get done make it hard for us to make time for each other. But I'm so glad that you are mine and that I get to do all the craziness with you every day! I wouldn't want anyone else to trudge through this journey of faith with. You are my best friend in the whole world! Thank you for all you do for our family! Like today...you worked at Bryan's house. Thank you for your willingness to help us get what we need to get things done without complaining! You do so much for our family and are the best dad and husband! .......well, that's it..My time is up! I love you!

Motivator

Just was thinking about you and all the exercise and eating better that we have been doing together. Ever since you got back from Ukraine we have both been trying our best. I can't imagine if you were against healthy eating or even if you just were apathetic toward my needs to be healthier. I know you want the same thing, but not all husbands do and not just that, many just do their own thing and don't help their wives like you do. And besides all the health stuff, you are just the most supportive partner I could ever ask for. A true best friend because I think that is what a good best friend would do....help and go through the battles/struggles together!! It means the world to me and you getting up in the mornings and sticking with the running is very motivating for me. It makes me choose to go ahead and get up when all I want to do is ignore and just stay in bed! Thank you for helping me!

Now besides all that....you are looking good! :)  Truly, I notice it the most in your super strong legs but I see it in your arms too right now. I don't know how you feel about it, but it is showing! I know you were feeling self conscious before you went to Ukraine and were complaining about your belly! So, I just want you to know that all this work is doing stuff!!! I get discouraged easily with weight loss and exercise and trying to look better but I know as we keep going I will look better and better....and it truly is....FOR YOU! I love getting to be attractive to you!

because you're my favorite!!